A plain computer illiterate guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.
Tech: What's the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: You'll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don't! I just need to change the startup files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You'll need to replace it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to change the startup and it will fix the probl em! All I need is for you to tell me the command.
10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don't normally tell our Customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix the problem.
User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end of the
CONFIG.SYS.
Letme know how it goes.
10 minutes later.
User: It didn't work. The power supply is still smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That's your problem there. That version of DOS didn't come with NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch that will give you the file. Let me know how it goes.
1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech: How did you come to that conclusion?
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told h im about what you said, and he started asking questions about the make of power supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn't compatible with NOSMOKE.
Showing posts with label fun. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fun. Show all posts
Customer Support............
|
U Know Y in our Office everyone hates picking the main phone:
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1)
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have
done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
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2)
Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support: " Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"
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3).
Customer: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
TechSupport: "Tell me what you've done."
Customer: "I typed 'A:SETUP'."!
Tech Support: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer: "It says '[HCL] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer: "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------4).
Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
TechSupport: ?!%#$
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5).
Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
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--------------------------------------------------------------------
1)
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have
done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
2)
Customer: "I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message."
Tech Support: " Did you install the update?"
Customer: "No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
3).
Customer: "I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word."
TechSupport: "Tell me what you've done."
Customer: "I typed 'A:SETUP'."!
Tech Support: "Ma'am, remove the disk and tell me what it says."
Customer: "It says '[HCL] Restore and Recovery disk'."
Tech Support: "Insert the MS Word setup disk."
Customer: "What?"
Tech Support: "Did you buy MS word?"
Customer: "No..."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------4).
Customer: "Do I need a computer to use your software?"
TechSupport: ?!%#$
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5).
Tech Support: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"
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